Author Christy Angelette

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My mother once I had a dream God was calling her home, holding her arm as she was dangling in the sky, she looked down saying, “what about Lee and Christy.” instantly she began falling and woke up. She spent many years in tears, dysfunction and domestic violence because she couldn’t find the strength to let go and keep moving forward towards her God given purpose.
It wasn’t a dream of death, God was offering her new life.
I know because decades later I had a similar encounter.  We have to let go of the old life when God is doing a new thing, I was created for more than my pain causing demons pleasure.
May is Mental health month, a subject matter I discuss all year because clearly I am not the only one battling with mental illness.  I’ve encountered men and women who are so disturbed yet take no accountability for their actions, active abusers who are often protected by the system.
These perpetrators are known as narcissists.

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Narcissistic personality disorder is found more commonly in men. The cause is unknown but likely involves a combination of genetic and environmental factors.
Symptoms include an excessive need for admiration, disregard for others’ feelings, an inability to handle any criticism, and a sense of entitlement. The disorder needs to be diagnosed by a professional. Treatment involves talk therapy.

Like most mental illnesses there is no cure and the most dangerous person is one that is walking around undiagnosed and untreated. Sean Combs aka P Diddy is a classic textbook narcissist.
The Webster definition is just the tip of the iceberg. This type of person is the closest to a demon an open portal for mayhem.

In my experience it’s not the self-absorption that has been disturbing,
it’s the disregard for others’ feelings, the cold-hearted nature given when you’ve been deemed useless.  As humans, we all have some level of grandiose thinking but can still be empathetic and compassionate to one another. Narcissists cannot.

The most scary thing is their ability to deceive others and have the victim think their behavior towards them is because of something they are doing.
Borderline sociopaths who will have you going crazy. There is no cure, and the best option is to leave them where they are and save yourself. Nearly a decade had gone by before I realized the extent to which I was being victimized. Significant damage had already been done.

My ex who I’ve been forced by his actions to love and hate, is a problem I face and pray about every day.
He is almost sixty and so far gone it’s ridiculous. He’s a cold calculating criminal breaking women at his discretion.

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Antisocial personality disorder, sometimes called sociopathy, is a mental health condition in which a person consistently shows no regard for right and wrong and ignores the rights and feelings of others 
The mental illness tree roots run deep, the worst out of the bunch is a psychopath, and I believe I have also divorced that; he and his mother went to great links in an attempt to make me self-harm and eventually flee from them.
A psychopath is a person affected by a chronic mental disorder with abnormal or violent social behavior.
Psychopaths may also be manipulative, charming, and exploitative, and behave in an impulsive and risky manner. They may lack conscience or guilt and refuse to accept responsibility for their actions. Psychopathy is one of the most well-known and well-studied personality disorders. 
This is where Puffy mentally lives, he has upgraded to the final climax of insanity.
While facing the issues with my own mental issues and co-parenting with a man who is worse than I am, I had to learn all these things to make sense of what was happening.
These are just a few examples of severe mental disorders, but I now believe there are a large number of men and women walking around with this demon inside them.
People and mental health specialists fail to realize the significance spirituality plays in treatment. According to my oldest son who is receiving his master’s degree in psychology, God and the devil are all but eliminated from the conversation and education.

As for my experiences, Therapists and doctors of private practice get the okay from me to proceed spiritually and have been essential to my healing and understanding of my own diagnosis, reactions, and symptoms. Lately, I’ve been thinking about and already addressing within my new book, a disorder called DID.

Dissociative identity disorder (DID), previously known as multiple personality disorder (MPD), is a chronic mental health condition that involves having two or more distinct personality identities. Each identity can have its name, characteristics, and personal history. People with DID may experience intense changes in their identity, such as:
Different parts of their identity may have different needs
They may need to use different coping techniques for different parts of their identity
Identity states may seem to be different ages and genders
They may feel as if they have multiple people living inside their head
They may feel like they’re possessed by other identities.

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Personally I feel because of the extent of repeated trauma I have endured may have  caused a mild form of this, there have been times where I  have felt split, especially during triggered moments of rage or what my brain perceives to be abuse. 

An angry volatile version of me takes over and I feel like a back seat passenger.  This is a conversation My new therapist and I have not yet fully discussed. In the past others have glazed over it because it falls under the same umbrella of having no cure, but I’m discovering there are treatments that are not greatly publicized or available because pushing pills is the narrative, it makes pharmaceutical companies and doctors richer and shortens the life span of individuals which makes more room and more resources on the planet.

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I’ve learned you have to be knowledgeable to save yourself or get lost in the pitfalls.  We have only covered a few mental illnesses here, there are more to explore that identify with the times we are living in and the abnormal things we are seeing.  Thank you for reading.  Subscribe to be notified when I post, to support my healing Journey and dream of being a well paid writer. 

Love, Christy

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