Author Christy Angelette

It seems Men living in this decade aren’t interested in genuine friendship or having a spiritual connection. Well, those I have encountered. They are aggressively in pursuit of sex and playing manipulative mind games, giving an illusion of something more. I rarely connect with others, especially as a lover. I am guarded about who I allow into my orbit. It depends on the energy they bring. Is it peaceful, authentic, wise, and loving? Based on tragic experiences, I’ve learned, people will pretend to be whatever you want them to be, in order to fulfill their needs and leave. I have to be careful with the way I move within these relational waters. There are predators who will feed off my trauma.

Being survivors of trauma and entering into new relationships, we must operate in mindfulness and move differently.

A predator can smell the blood of an open wound. The attraction is your trauma.

It’s a necessity to know which stage of healing you are in, to start off slow with a bases of friendship. Only allowing those who are genuine, compassionate and understanding in. Take the time to know who you are dealing with. I find it liberating to let someone know that I’m different in the very beginning. Early exits based upon my mental history and diagnosis are less unsettling than it would be had I put real time in. This can back fire as stated above, if you’ve encountered a narcissistic personality, they feed off your pain and will have you bounded in an unhealthy entanglement. I put true value in friendship and see the importance of getting to know a person before things become romantic. Setting healthy boundaries to maintain and preserve my peace, soul and sanity. One area of my trauma is sexual. In knowing this, I have to be extremely cautious with physical intimacy, for me it could easily be mistaken as love. The healthy emotional love I never received as child or a woman. I am healing and growing as the journey continues.