Author Christy Angelette

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When your mind breaks, demons can get in through the cracks, and mental illness is a reflection of that.  Depression is demonic oppression causing souls and minds to crumble underneath the pressure. If things seem to fall apart no matter how hard you try, chances are you’ve been spiritually targeted all your life. How is your relationship with Christ?
Healing of significant trauma is a lifelong journey that requires help beyond the entrapment of pharmaceutical medications.  As a patient and a voyeur through my mother, I’ve discovered they do more harm to the mind and body than help.

Listen to the side effects in the commercials. They fail to mention the withdrawal symptoms of brain zaps and pruritus. (Extreme itching.)

I have a permanent hand tremor which is evident from the neurological damage a similar brand of medication caused.  Here’s the kicker, I had only taken the medication for less than a month.

Holding Big Pharma accountable is another thing this administration is standing firm on.

Medicinal medications like medical cannabis, trauma therapy, journaling, and listening to healing frequencies have helped.  I’ve been grieving the life I could’ve had, and entered the acceptance stage of where I am at.

In my case, a chemical imbalance is not the root of my problem. It was constant abuse, violence, and trauma during critical states of brain development.  Situations so devastating that break your mind and spirit have to be addressed.  Internal work must be done to learn and overcome.

Since the very beginning, life has been a loop of instability and dysfunction, more than I can bear. I’ve been personally acquainted with pain and eluding happiness. Faith is the only thing keeping me grounded and rooted in reality.
God waking me up, breathing life into a soul that had died internally long ago is the indication that I am needed here.  Among the tools that I use, Neuroscience and EMDR have been the most helpful. In a triggered state, I can now calm, ground myself, and  verbalize, “It’s okay.” I’ve survived the worst of times and can make it through today.

Once upon a time I believed family was everything.  Instead, they lurk in the shadows, watching me fail instead of helping me succeed.
Their greatest effort was given in escorting me into mental institutions and walking away.

When I needed them the most, like it had been done to my mother, they told me no.
The stigma and ignorance of mental illness are the killer of many who take their life or die internally by disassociating from reality.

The holidays are approaching, it’s the most evil and darkest time of the year, beginning with the celebration of Satan and pagan holidays. Societal and spiritual oppression have left souls neglected. In a weakened state people are open vessels.

To those like myself who have no one other than themselves, continue to hold on to God.     Faith is our anchor in the storm. During this time of year, the desire to end your suffering is heightened. Remember that Jesus didn’t want to carry the cross, he was called to.  In the end, he was rewarded and resurrected for his faithfulness.  All the disciples were martyrs for Christ, except for John, whom Jesus had instructed to care for his mother. He died in isolation on an island.

One of My crash out suicide prevention scriptures that deeply connects me with Jesus reads:

[38] He told them, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” [39] He went on a little farther and bowed with his face to the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.”

Matthew 26:38-39 NLT– This was the night before he had to endure his crucifixion.

Gratitude is a necessary component too.
The things that are taken for granted are what I focus on, like eating my favorite food, having a roof over my head, blue skies, laughter, and sunshiny days. My mental health isn’t normal but it’s better. The children are happy, healthy, and have provision. Their lives are not empty; it’s filled with love.
When I intentionally reflect on my blessings the list continues to grow.

Changing your thoughts, changes how you feel.  As a trauma survivor, I revisit the pain, not as a victim,  but a viewer who loves that version of me with the battered heart and tears-stained face.
I whisper to myself, “It will be okay.”

I will have redemption in this life or the next.  I cannot explain or give a valid reason for insurmountable pain, but Hope still remains, with just one word, God could change everything.

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